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Google Overheard in the Office

A few days ago I posted some Overheard in New York Google Posts. Today is some Overhead in the Office. It’s not quite as good as the orriginal, but the office posts are still really funny. If you like these, subscribe to the feed, enjoy!

No Problem, Then
Coworker #1 on speakerphone: How do I Google something?
Coworker #2: Go to W-W-W dot Google dot com. Then just use it like any other search engine.
Coworker #1: What’s a search engine?
Coworker #2: You know, like when you use Yahoo or MSN to look something up.
Coworker #1: I’ve never Googled before in my life, and I never want to again!

Overheard by: it actually got worse

Or Time Management. Whatever.
Office manager: I’m going to Google time travel!

What Happens When You Use Google China
Office manager: Civil War Battlefield Protection, how can I help you?
Woman on phone: Yes, I’m trying to find information on the Civil War and I just can’t.
Office manager: Well, have you tried the internet?
Woman: Yes, I typed “Civil War” into Google and NOTHING comes up on the Civil War.
Office manager: …Really?
Woman: Yes… so can you tell me who was in the Civil War?
Office manager: That would be the northern states and the southern states.
Woman: Not the British?
Office manager: Um, that was the Revolutionary War.
Overheard by: Astonished

Just Scan in His Photo and Use Face-Recognition Google
Boss: I went to school with this guy…I don’t remember his name, but he just became the president of some real estate development company in DC. Can you look him up on the internet? I’d like to send him a note.

I Think You’ll Like the Results
Boss : What is that red thing on top of a rooster’s head called? I can’t find a description anywhere on the Internet.
Employee: Just Google ‘cock’ and ‘diagram.’

Internship
Boss: How many servers do you think Google has?
Lackey: Infinite.
Boss: Infinite? You’re a retard.
Overheard by: choking on a brownie

Technical Know-How
Boss on phone: Wait, wait, wait, does your computer have Google on it? Yeah, just type it in there.

Update PR File
CTO: My interview article is in USA Today!
Programer: Can you send me the link? Never mind, I’ll just Google “USA Today”

Back to Work
Engineer: I’m against Google Earth! The terrorists are using it! And the communists!

Sensitivity Training
Boss: So what’s the going rate for hiring midgets these days?
Boss: Yeah, I’m sure you can just fire up Google and type in “Midget to hire tri-state” and somthin’s gonna pop up.

Send Out Press Release
Boss: So see if you can find these people’s email addresses.
Intern: …You want me to find Desmond Tutu’s email address?
Boss: Try Google if you get stumped.

Back to Work
Producer: My friend went to the Galapagos Islands and was astounded. They have birds called blue boobies. Google “blue boobies”. You’ll see pictures of them.
Suit: I’m not searching for blue boobies on my computer. I’ll get called into the office for a talk.
Producer: Oh, I’ll do it…see?
Suit: Wow, who would have thought that would’t have brought up a porn site?

Scan PC
Tech: Oh crap, I’ve been infected by Google.

Install Yahoo!
Boss: Do we have Google installed on our internet?
IT guy: We put it on your machine yesterday.

Published 26 Oct 2007

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